A Reflection on Educational Reform.

I was going to refrain from commenting on my recent endeavor to find out more about educational reform in my home state of Connecticut, because in many ways I am no expert on the subject. However, I feel able to make a few comments based on a Q & A session I witnessed regarding Governor Malloy's proposed bill. This bill, from what I have gathered, mostly deals with updating and changing the teacher evaluation protocol, making teachers accountable in a variety of ways (test scores, evaluation of student progress, observations of teacher performance, peer/parent review, and whole-school progress). Without the percentages, this seems a mostly fair evaluation of teachers (but again, I am no expert and am only beginning to learn about this bill). However, as a prospective teacher who will (hopefully) have a full-time teaching position in the fall, I do have a few concerns regarding this breakdown. 

For one thing, standardized test scores of a teacher's students count for 22.5% of the total teacher evaluation. Considering this alone counts for nearly a quarter of a teacher's evaluation, and probably contains the most amount of uncontrollable factors on the teacher's part, is that high percentage reasonable? As I have never taught in my own classroom, I cannot be entirely sure. I do have reservations about it, though. For one thing, on the day of the test, there are many factors out of the teacher's control that can affect student success, such as hours of sleep the student received the night before, whether or not the student had a balanced breakfast, and the testing environment a student is placed in (especially for tests like the SATs). These things can affect student focus and their cognitive functions. If their basic needs, such as food and sleep, are not met, their performance on other tasks is already limited in success (Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs). 

Another concern I have regarding the governor's answers to questions at this meeting was his dismissive attitude toward concerns of poverty in certain districts. His answers to concerns of educators and parents regarding the effects of poverty on student performance were that within each of the most "troubled" districts, there was at least one "successful" school (paraphrasing here). Well, in a district that has more than 10 schools, one successful building does not instill me with a sense of hope. In my grad school classes, we have discussed at length the degree to which change is possible within education without changing the society that education exists within first. Every conversation has ended in a consensus that schools reflect society, and so society must be the first to change. So, his response does not really answer the question. 

From my response above, you may think I do not support our governor in his endeavors to improve education. In fact, I applaud his efforts to make education better, because it is true that just 20 years ago, Connecticut was the #1 state with regards to education, which is no longer true and in fact we are in danger of dropping out of the top 10 states. I merely want to reflect on some of the reservations I have regarding where the state government's efforts are being concentrated. 

I will admit two things I am especially interested in seeing succeed within this bill. I am intrigued by the idea of more "individualized" professional development for teachers. I am looking forward to seeing how this is executed, as everyone (teachers and students alike) has different skills and levels of mastery. A more individualized development for teachers will mean that teachers can get the support they need in the areas they need it most, instead of sitting in a large lecture hall while someone imbibes information. Also, I am interested in this notion of an improvement of communication between agencies (police, schools, DCFS, etc.) that are involved in student cases, so that all agencies have complete and accessible information. After all, communication is one of the most important skills you learn in school, and the "hidden curriculum" shows students how the world around them operates. If they see that communication between parties that have some kind of connection to themselves is limited and unsuccessful, that is how they will learn to communicate. 

Well, enough of my rantings about this issue. I think I've gone on long enough. I only hope that the changes made will be for the benefit of our students, as they are our first priority. 

Fiction.

"Sometimes the whole world seems fictionalized."

10 Confessions

In no particular order…. 

1. I love country music.

Seriously, I am the person who cranks it all the way up, windows wide open and sings at the top of their lungs. I have absolutely no shame about this fact. 

2. I have never been in love.

I think I’ve gotten close a few times, but I have this knack for finding the one thing that will cause a person to walk away and somehow exploit it so they go running. 

3. I am an exceedingly positive person, despite #2. 

No kidding, my optimism is nauseating at times. I am a pro at finding the silver lining in EVERYTHING. True, I have my moments of despair, just like anyone else. But usually they are short lived. 

4. I am a chronic apologizer. 

Yes, I am one of “those” girls who apologizes for everything, even if it’s someone else’s behavior. This comes from an inherent toughness on myself. Anything that can even remotely (like 7 times removed) reflect bad on me, I tend to apologize for. 

5. I hate the sun. 

No, I am not some Twilight Fanatic who thinks I sparkle when the sun is out. I legitimately hate the sun. I love beautiful days, and enjoy them as much as the next person, but usually my beach trips consist of layers of thin cotton clothing over every inch of my body, under a beach umbrella, with SPF 200 on any inch of bare skin, reading a book and listening to music on my iPod. 

6. I am a huge Syfy fan.

I won’t say that I like everything Syfy in all it’s glory, and it is a rather recent discovery. I have lately been very into BBC Syfy shows and/or movies. I think it’s the whole “escaping from reality” bit. It’s imaginative, and well, I love it. 

7. I watch chick flicks in order to criticize their lack of reality. 

Yes, it is quite possible I am a betrayer of my sex, in that I really don’t get crazy over chick flicks. Just today, I was telling a friend about a chick flick with a totally unrealistic ending. Yes, it was an artsy, independent film that was actually pretty imaginative for its parameters. In fact, the circumstances of the movie are less likely to happen than a unicorn knocking on my front door, but who’s counting? (See what I mean…)

8. I am O.B.S.E.S.S.E.D. with peanut butter. 

If there isn’t peanut butter in the house, there are serious repercussions. My absolute favorite thing to eat with peanut butter in it are graham crackers, with peanut butter, and a banana slice on top. I’ll take that over s’mores any day. 

9. I am so freaking clumsy. 

I am not exaggerating. If there is something within 10 feet of me that is breakable (even things you wouldn’t think were breakable), you need to get it away from me. The list includes anything from family heirloom teacups, to entire shelves. Now, if it’s MEANT to be smashed up with a sledge hammer, I’m totally your girl, but be sure to wrap anything you don’t want broken in bubble wrap before I come over. 

10. I am secretly a 5-year-old inside.

I love coloring, finger-painting, Hungry Hungry Hippos. Basically anything a five-year-old gets to do and have it be socially acceptable, is something I love. In fact, I think I’m going to go watch “How to Train Your Dragon,” and wish I had a Toothless of my own. 

Hope you enjoyed my quirky confessions! :)

Power in Splintered Wood.

I shook the sweat from my ponytail and shifted my weight to my dominant foot, climbing back into the dumpster. I stomped tentatively on an old speaker before putting my whole weight into it. I moved from speaker to anything stable looking, searching for things to place at the alter of my discontent. I find an old, beaten desk (or part of one) and pull it from the wreckage, dropping it over the side and climbing after. This will do. 

Some say a girl has no business wielding a sledge hammer, but they don't know the power it gives to someone who lets people damage her.  Besides, I feel pain, why not power? At a different point in my life, I might have curled into a fetal position and hid behind my books and things that are safe. But, I can no longer be that person. One too many times I have given in to my own cowardice. I have let needs go unsatisfied for fear of disturbance. I have sealed my lips when I should have screamed at injustice. Too long I have let things go unchallenged. So today, sledge hammer in hand, I will unleash it all. This desk will become the splintered wood of everything that has ever left a scar. 

Yes, this will do. 

Tomorrow, the pain will be nothing but a distant memory. 

"This Means War"

Well, I admit, I did not remember that this was the movie my friend, Beth was talking about when she suggested seeing, “This Means War.” In all actuality, the movie was somewhat hysterical throughout. It had a lot of heart-racing action, witty banter, and even a little romance thrown in. There was something for everyone (except maybe for the kids). I was thoroughly surprised at this movie and am definitely glad I went to go see it. The ending even manages to surprise you a little bit. Just when you think it’s going to be ridiculously cliche and forced (though it still is a little), it packs a little punch of laughter right before the credits roll. While I would not necessarily say it’s the best movie I have seen in awhile, it is far beyond the mediocrity of most of the romantic comedies released in the recent past. I would vote this one a 3.8/5 stars. I can’t quite give it 4, but it’s close. Definitely go see it if you get the chance. :-)

The Economy

What is important for the U.S. Economy?

Right now I am watching President Obama speak at the Rolls-Royce Crosspointe facility in Virginia. I have never been an "economist" and believe me when I say I am not very economy-conscious. Money is not really my strong point. I know enough to keep my checkbook balanced and my extra expenses in check (with the occasional reckless splurge). However, as one of my goals for my life (no, not a new years resolution--I despise those), I am trying to be more conscious of what is going on around me. Today, that brings me to the U.S. economy, more specifically Obama's speech. 

Side Note: I believe Obama is a much more successful Orator than some of his predecessors. 

Things that I loved:

• Making education (especially higher education) more affordable for families.
• Having our businesses lead the world in "clean" energy. 
• Dreaming big dreams and feeling confident about the future.

Other side note: Does making education more affordable mean increasing or decreasing teacher salaries? 'Cause that could potentially sway me on my mention of those comments above. 

I certainly have my ideals when it comes to the way I think the world should be, but the world is a whole lot bigger than those ideals, perhaps too big to make them possible. I do have a few thoughts on the economy, but as until recently I really have not been part of the economy conversation, I do not know how accurate my views may be. 

Thoughts on the Economy from a limited Point of View:

1. Those who have more, should give more. 

2. Communities need to invest in community businesses.

3. The economy should support education. 

4. Education should support the economy. 

5. NO JOB SHOULD BE BELITTLED. 

All right. I will not elaborate too much on the thoughts above. I think anyone who reads them will get the gist of where I stand. The only one I will explain is the largest one: #5. As a soon-to-be teacher, I certainly do not believe in belittling any human being. Well, that includes the type of work they do. Now, I could be accused of being a snob at one point in my life, due to the fact that I used to insist I would never work at a fast food chain, or in a retail store, if I could help it. Well, I have worked in similar, if not directly in those conditions now, and I certainly respect anyone who can do that for longer than a temporary time frame. 

Those aren't the only jobs that are attached to certain stigmas.  Other jobs include farmers, plumbers, electricians, mechanics, etc. However, people should  think before they belittle such professions. After all, what would we do without mechanics to fix our transmissions; electricians to reconnect our power lines; and plumbers to repair faucets and toilets? We would have to be even more superhuman than we are already required to be.

 

I don't know about you, 

but I already don't have enough time in a day. 

I know you all see my point. So, for parents, teachers, or mentors of any profession, pay attention to this: NO MATTER WHAT, always support what a person wants to do with their life, even if it is not what you dreamt for them. 

Better to support them than to lose them altogether. 

That is a lesson I have learned by accident very recently. 

All right. I did not want to preach. Time to move on to other parts of my day. 

-M

Adventure is out there!

The view from my semi-dangerous hike this weekend. One of the reasons I love Connecticut. However, the slush did make it rather difficult to climb the steep trail to this point. Sliding down was fun, though! 

A favorite.

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

—	e.e. cummings I absolutely love this poem. Whenever I’m feeling lost, it just has a way of reminding me what is important. Keep the ones that mean the most to you close. You never know when you’ll be missing them.  Rest peacefully, Grandpa. <3 1.3.12 -M

Feeling a little political...

I don’t pretend to be the most politically aware person in the world. Nor do I pretend that most of the time I’m not caught up in my own busy life. I know there is no way to be aware of everything that happens in the world, but if this morning has done anything, it has made me more aware of my own ignorance and hypocrisy. 

As a pre-service teacher, soon to become certified, I have often talked to students about being critical and being aware of the world they live in beyond the walls of their homes and their schools. And yet, have I done this myself? No. I have been ignorant to many things that have been unchallenged for years. This hypocrisy is inexcusable. 

The U.S. is often criticized for being self-centered and greedy. Perhaps that is how we have managed to maintain our “superpower” status. I’ve been out of the loop so long, I’m sure I have nowhere near the amount of information necessary to make that accusation. However, I have noticed the way in which many people in my own life (myself included), forget to be human. 

I’m not one for making pledges and promises when I may not be able to keep them. However, my eyes are a little more open than they were yesterday. 

Here is something I know for sure: 

At their core, human beings are emotional, but in recent generations the expression of raw emotion has been frowned upon and deemed “uncivilized.” Due to this, people have forgotten the power and beauty in emotion. We have forgotten our consciences and our instincts. 

However, we have not completely forgotten these emotions. No, we have only suppressed them or internalized them so that we are not embarrassed by them. Lately, I’ve come to believe a little embarrassment is good for the soul. I found this out yesterday in a rather surreal moment of my own life. 

Let me explain. 

I am currently a Graduate student, working toward a M. Ed. in Curriculum & Instruction to gain certification in Secondary English. I am in my final semester, during which I have to complete an Inquiry Research Project. Yesterday, I had the class that pairs with this project that is supposed to teach us how to research, collect data, and analyze that data. For the past three classes (which are each 2.5 hours long), our professor has spent (wasted, rather) our time by going so in depth into the concept of focus groups (introduction, mock focus group, and analysis of focus group data), which less than 10% of the class is using. 

Note: PREVIOUS to these classes, the class banded together and formulated a list of our most pertinent needs and concerns regarding this class and wrote her a collective email expressing them. She never addressed our concerns. She merely shrugged them off by saying, “You have to trust me.”

Anyways, back to the point. This fateful day, I am sitting in class, on facebook because the first 40 minutes have all been explicit instruction on how to edit a table in Microsoft Word, which felt intellectually insulting as someone who has been using this program since Middle School. My colleagues in class were discussing on our class group the audacity of this woman to spend 40 minutes going over something that we could have taught ourselves in 5. I posted saying, “I feel like I should say something.” It only took two responses of “DO IT” for me to raise my hand, interrupt, and proceed to ask the professor if there was a simpler, more succinct way of going over this, because many of us were already familiar with the concept. I suggested that maybe it would be more prudent to hand out an example of what the correct formatting is and then differentiating by taking those who needed additional help aside in a small group and assisting them in the more elaborate instruction she had been giving. 

Her response: I will be done in 5 or 10 more minutes. 

The result: The director of our program, whom we had left out of the conversation out of respect for his position and the belief that she would work with us if we presented our concerns, was notified of the gravity of the situation by phone calls, email, and the like, from several people. Before the end of yesterday, appropriate action had been taken to ensure that our concerns were met and taken into account. 

This is a prime example of change only being possible if one person starts to make it happen. Was it embarrassing for me to have to call out the teacher in the middle of her class on her poor teaching methods? IMMENSELY. Did it need to be done? ABSOLUTELY. 

Any of my close friends will be the first to tell you that I avoid conflict at all costs. However, I pay a lot of money in tuition for this program and a waste of my time is a waste of not only my money, but my intellect and efforts as well. It was the final straw and I now feel better about what has happened as a result. It is fortuitous, I believe, that my group was scheduled with her as our teacher, because we are just outspoken and revolutionary enough to do something about it. 

If nothing else, take from this that you need to stick up for yourself, even in the face of embarrassment. Your life will be much more worthwhile if you do. A note of caution though: make sure it is worth standing up for, and if it is at all possible, avoid burning bridges. You never know when that bridge might be useful in the future. 

-M

Hello World!

How’s it going?

As a person with a background in writing, I know the importance of a good introduction (though I really can’t promise anything here). So, before I delve into the complex intricacies of life and everything it entails, I’d like to introduce myself.

This is me. ---------->

I admit, not the best picture I could have found, but it will do for today’s purposes. I am 23 years old and a Graduate Student, working to complete my Masters in Education. Upon the receipt of my certification, I hope to be teaching Language Arts in a high school in September. I live in the suburbs in Connecticut, but I love to travel and to experience new things. 

My interests include books, music, yoga, and outdoorsy activities. I am very adventurous (especially lately), and I especially love hiking and am trying to get over my fear of heights by doing lots of it. I also love doing interior design and baking as hobbies. 

One of my true passions is for writing, though I do not consider myself a novelist by any means. It’s one of those things that calms me and helps me make sense of my own life. Even as an introvert, the idea of spending endless hours of every day writing “the next American classic” as my mom sometimes puts it, wasn’t enough. I turned to teaching because I wanted to inspire students to LOVE things, to have PASSION, even if it is not for my specific content area. 

Lately, as more and more of my friends have delved into the political arena (and kept me privy to such information), I have been more curious about what is going on in the world, rather than being wrapped up in my own problems. Let me tell you, it is truly humbling to do so. When you realize some of the big issues that other people face every day, you learn to put things into perspective. 

Anyways, this blog is really meant as a means to make sense of not only my own issues (which I am sure I will discuss plentifully), but also thoughts on the various aspects of life: the ups, the downs, and everything in between. I will try to keep as much variety in my posting as possible. I’m a pretty eclectic person, so it shouldn’t be too difficult (theoretically) Either way, I hope you enjoy my blog! 

-M